Building your family

Talking to your child about donor conception can feel terrifying. What do you say? When do you say it? And how do you do it without creating shame or confusion?
In this episode, reproductive therapist Lisa Schuman, LCSW, shares her Zoom Out Theory for talking to donor‑conceived children about their story. Instead of getting stuck in today’s anxiety, Lisa helps you think about your child’s long‑term emotional health and sense of self.
You’ll learn how to acknowledge your own feelings, and start (or continue) the conversation in a way that builds connection rather than fear.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why talking to your donor‑conceived child can feel so stressful and lonelyWhat it means to “zoom out” and think about who your child is becoming over timeHow to balance your emotions with what your child actually needs to hearWhy “waiting until they’re older” often makes conversations harder, not easierPractical steps to move from feeling stuck to feeling clearer and more confidentEpisode Resources:https://familybuilding.net/events-page/

If you’re doing IVF or thinking about it, will more technology in the lab actually be better than a human embryologist handling your eggs and embryos – and what do two new breakthroughs mean for your chances?
In this episode of Building Your Family, I’m joined by Dr Richard Paulson, former president of ASRM and early IVF pioneer, to unpack what’s really happening behind the lab door: automation, AI, robotics, and why the lab may matter more than almost anything else for your IVF success rates and safety.
We cover:
How IVF labs have evolved since the 1980s and why embryology is so sensitiveWhere technology, AI and automation are already helping embryologistsA new system that finds extra oocytes humans miss in follicular fluidWhat “automated day‑0” actually means and why it could be a turning pointHow these advances might change success rates, safety and standardization2–3 smart questions to ask your clinic about their lab and technologyWhat an IVF lab could look like 10–15 years from nowWhether you’re in the middle of IVF or just starting to research fertility treatment, this episode is designed to translate complex lab science into clear, humane decisions about your reproductive health and reproductive freedom.
Chapters:00:00 Introduction to IVF and Technological Advances02:15 Historical Context of IVF04:50 The Role of the Laboratory in IVF07:21 Automation and Future of IVF10:55 Recent Advances in IVF Technology20:04 Finding More Oocytes in Follicular Fluid25:47 Implications for Success Rates in IVF26:16 Practical Applications for Patients31:27 Safety and Reliability in IVF Technology33:36 Conclusion and Future Outlook
Subscribe to Building Your Family for more expert‑led conversations that turn IVF science into real‑world guidance you can actually use.
Episode resources
School USC: https://keck.usc.edu/faculty-search/richard-j-paulson/Medicine USC: https://www.keckmedicine.org/provider/richard-j-paulson/F&S Reports: https://www.fertstertreports.org/

If you’re considering donor conception and feel like you “can’t see the forest for the trees,” this is your zoom‑out episode. Before you choose a donor, sign with a clinic, or pay an agency, you need the big picture.
In this video, we step back from the overwhelm and walk through the full donor conception landscape:• How your decisions affect your child long‑term (identity, mental health, relationships)• Common mistakes parents make when they’re rushed, exhausted, or only hearing the clinic’s side• How to think about psychological screening
My goal with this episode is simple: to help you feel calmer, clearer, and better equipped to lead your family through donor conception without feeling lost or alone.
If you found this helpful, you might also like my workshops on• How to tell your child their donor conception story: https://familybuilding.net/events-page/• Donor Conception 101 for new and future parents: https://familybuilding.net/events-page/
#donorconception #ivf #eggdonor #spermdonor #lgbtqfamily  #familybuilding

Are your tampons quietly exposing you to toxic metals and chemicals that could affect your hormones and fertility?In this episode of Building Your Family, Dr. Nancy Reame breaks down what the FDA has (and hasn’t) done on tampon safety since 2005 and how that compares to Europe.We cover the real story behind tampon safety, Toxic Shock Syndrome, and what the science actually says about toxins in period products. You’ll learn how chemicals are absorbed through the vagina, what we know about toxic metals like lead and cadmium in tampons, and how all of this may impact menstrual health and fertility.
Dr. Reame explains:
    The history of tampon safety and how Toxic Shock Syndrome changed regulations    Why US tampon regulations haven’t been updated since 2005, and how Europe handles toxic materials differently    How and why the vagina is so absorbent, and what that means for chemical exposure    What current research suggests about toxic metals and endocrine-disrupting chemicals in period products    The real risks of long-term exposure vs what’s been overhyped    Pros and cons of alternatives like menstrual cups and pads (including how to use them safely)    How to read labels, evaluate brands, and find reliable, science-based resources    How to stay appropriately concerned without spiraling into panic
We also talk about advocacy: how to push for better testing, transparency in ingredients, and stronger public health guidance for women’s health products.If you care about menstrual health, fertility, and safer period products, hit subscribe, share this episode with a friend, and check the links in the description for the research and resources mentioned.
PubMed: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32382713/Consumer reports: https://www.consumerreports.org/Made Safe: https://madesafe.org/Mamavation: https://mamavation.com/
 
#tamponsafety #toxicshocksyndrome #periodproducts #womenshealth #menstrualhealth #fertility #toxins #endocrinedisruptors #reproductivehealth #periodtalk  #buildingyourfamilypodcast

Your clinic and agency help you with the medical and legal parts of surrogacy. But who helps you zoom out and see the bigger picture for you, your surrogate, and your future child?
In this Zoom Out Theory episode, reproductive therapist Lisa Schuman, LCSW, talks about how to step back from the day‑to‑day stress of surrogacy so you can make clearer decisions and set your journey up for long‑term success. We explore how most surrogates are caring, altruistic people, how to build a healthy relationship and communication rhythm with your surrogate, and how to keep your future child in mind without getting overwhelmed.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
What the Zoom Out Theory is and how it applies to surrogacyHow emotions and stress can quietly shape decisions during your journeyKeys to the most helpful communication strategy with your surrogateWhy regular check‑ins and clear expectations matter over timeHow to think about the long‑term impact on your relationships and your future childWhy documenting your surrogacy experience can support your child laterHow to balance emotional awareness with rational clarity when you’re making big choicesIf you’re using surrogacy to build your family and want a calmer, more thoughtful journey, this episode will give you tools to zoom out and see the whole picture.
#surrogacy #familybuilding #donorconception

“No normal embryos” doesn’t always mean the end.Lisa talks with Dr. Norbert Gleicher and Dr. David Barad from the Center for Human Reproduction about IVF for tough cases, especially older patients. They discuss PGTA, aneuploid and mosaic embryos, immunology, inflammation, and why individualized, evidence‑based treatment can open options many patients don’t realize they have.
Have you been told you have “no normal embryos” and feel like you’re out of options?
In this episode of the Building Your Family Podcast, Lisa talks with Dr. Norbert Gleicher and Dr. David Barad from the Center for Human Reproduction about IVF for some of the toughest cases: older patients, “no normal embryos,” and cycles where many people are told there’s nothing else to try.
They discuss why careful diagnosis and truly individualized treatment matter so much, especially for older patients; how they think about embryos other clinics might not consider; and what current evidence actually shows about PGTA, aneuploid and mosaic embryos, and implantation. They also explore the role of immunology, inflammation, toxins like microplastics, supplements, and AI in embryo selection.
In this conversation, you’ll hear about:
    What “no normal embryos” really means (and what it doesn’t)    Why one‑size‑fits‑all IVF protocols often fail older patients    The controversy around PGTA and how it affects real‑world outcomes    When aneuploid and mosaic embryos may still be part of a thoughtful plan    How immunology, inflammation, and sensitivities can impact implantation    Personalized ovulation induction for older patients    Why evidence‑based, individualized care matters more than trends or hype
If you’ve been told there are no options left, this episode can help you ask better questions and understand what might still be possible for your family.
Subscribe to the Building Your Family Podcast for more evidence‑based conversations on fertility, donor conception, and surrogacy.
Episode resourcesWebsite: https://centerforhumanreprod.com/

In this first episode of the Zoom Out series, reproductive therapist, researcher, and author Lisa Schuman, LCSW unpacks the most important question almost no one asks about egg freezing.
Lisa explains why “How many eggs can I freeze?” is only part of the story, and why you also need to understand how many cycles and eggs you’re likely to need for the kind of family you actually want in the future. She introduces her Zoom Out Theory – a simple framework to help you step back from panic, manage stress, and make clearer decisions about your fertility.
Drawing on decades of clinical experience and research, Lisa also shares surprising data about non‑genetic parenthood options: how many egg freezing patients are open to donor eggs, embryos, or other paths if needed, and why that matters for how aggressively you pursue more cycles now.
You’ll learn:
The critical egg freezing question almost no one thinks to askWhy freezing “as many eggs as possible” isn’t always necessary – or helpfulHow your emotional state can quietly distort your fertility decisionsWhat Lisa’s research reveals about patients’ real openness to non‑genetic optionsA practical way to zoom out and plan for your long‑term family, not just the next cycleIf you’re considering egg freezing – or you’ve already frozen eggs and are wondering what comes next – this episode will help you balance facts and feelings so you can move forward with more confidence.
#eggfreezing #fertility #ivfjourney #fertilitypreservation#reproductivehealth #ttc #familybuilding #donorconception

In this episode of Building Your Family, Lisa Schuman, LCSW sits down with Dr. Jessica Gray, a physician who has lived through infertility, miscarriage, and the intense pressures of medical training on her way to motherhood.
Jessica shares how a stressful childhood shaped her resilience, what it was like to face endometriosis and IVF as both a doctor and a patient, and how she coped when a long‑hoped‑for pregnancy ended in miscarriage. She talks candidly about binders of notes, hours of research, and the feeling of “doing everything right” and still not getting the outcome she hoped for.
Together, Lisa and Jessica explore the emotional burden of infertility on both partners, the importance of support systems, and the small planning behaviors that can create a sense of control in an uncertain journey. Jessica reflects on how she now gives back to the infertility and parenting community, and what she would say to her younger self who was just starting down this road.
If you’ve felt isolated, overwhelmed, or “not like yourself” during infertility or pregnancy, this conversation offers validation, practical coping ideas, and hope.
Dr. Jessica Gray resources:Website: https://www.drjessicagraymd.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drjessicagraymd
#infertility #miscarriage #IVFjourney #endometriosis #ttccommunity #infertilitysupport #pregnancyloss #mentalhealth#familybuilding #fertilitytreatment #resilience#motherhood #medicaltraining #emotionalhealth #buildyourfamilypodcast 

If you’re single or in a relationship that isn’t working and you’re quietly Googling “single motherhood by choice,” this episode is for you. In this conversation with SMBC fertility doctor Alexis Melnick, MD, we walk through 5 clear steps to help you decide before your back is against the wall.
We cover both paths: staying on the relationship track and exploring single motherhood by choice on your own timeline. You’ll hear about the emotional, practical, financial, and support‑system questions to ask yourself so you can move from spiraling alone at 2 a.m. to making a grounded plan.
Inside this episode:• Who this is really for (single, dating, or in a shaky relationship)• The 5‑step framework Alexis uses with clients considering SMBC• Grief, stigma, and the “mourning period” for the life you imagined• Why so many people say they wish they’d decided earlier• How to know you didn’t “fail” if you choose this path
If you’re considering donor conception or surrogacy as a single parent, this will help you feel less alone, more informed, and better prepared.
Work with Alexis: [alm2036@med.cornell.edu]Get my free family‑building resources: 10 Things Donor Conceived Children Want Their Parents To Understand: https://familybuilding.net/free-downloads/
#singlemotherbychoice #singlemotherhood #donorconception #fertilityjourney #queerfamily

In honor of Pride, this episode is a love letter to queer family building.
I’ve pulled my favorite moments from conversations with LGBTQ+ parents, a fertility doctor, a midwife, a donor‑conceived person, and queer influencers who’ve built their families through donor conception and surrogacy. Together, they share how they answer intrusive questions, how they talk to their kids about donors and surrogates, and how they’ve learned to fully embrace the families they fought so hard to create.
We talk about:• Navigating fertility clinics, donor conception, and surrogacy as queer intended parents• What to actually say when people ask, “But who’s the real mom/dad?”• Age‑appropriate language for talking to children about donors and surrogates• Grief, joy, and pride on the path to queer parenthood• How our families feel now that their children are here
If you’re using reproductive medicine, donor conception, or surrogacy to build your family, you are not alone. This episode is meant to sit beside you in the messy middle, give you words when you’re tongue‑tied, and remind you that your family is real, valid, and worthy of celebration.
Please join us on the anniversary of Stonewall for a free Queer Family Building workshop. Register here: https://familybuilding.net/events-page/
#QueerFamily #DonorConception #QueerFertility #FamilyBuilding#DonorConceived #Pride